Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Monday, January 14, 2008

End of an Era

Been meaning to write that Gym Class ended. Not because Gym Teacher wanted to or thought I was ready - I think in her perfect world I would go to PT for the rest of my life - but because Insurance was ready to stop paying for it when 2007 became 2008. "PT feels so - I don't know - last year," yawned Insurance. "We're kinda over it. Aren't you?"

Kinda...? I feel really good, although I discovered that I still need to go to the gym and work the one-legged hamstring curl et al. Leg is unable to maintain a regular level of strength without it. It's a funny thing, because if I don't go, it kind of atrophies a little (maybe not visibly, but I can feel that it's weaker) and even just walking around I can feel the difference between them.

So I'll keep working the leg like a good little gym rat. If I get any parting words of advice from Gym Teacher that are particularly postworthy, you'll be the first to know.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Upped and Outed

Just got a call from Elaine, the greatest physician's assistant on the planet, to let me know that my surgery is going to be moved up a week to April 17th, as Dr. Buly's out of town the following week.

No problem. And then:

"So I hear you've written a blog!"

SO BUSTED!!!

Actually I don't know why I feel like the kid with their hand in the candy jar. She was delighted that I was sharing my experiences, and said that it was so helpful for other patients, and even went so far as to say that she heard it was "very good"!

Well then. I thank you. I've been emailing with a pre-op patient of Dr. Buly's and I'm reminded of myself this time last year, when it seemed like every question I got answers to only led to five more. Preparing obsessively so that I didn't have to think about anything else, like what the hell was it going to be like afterwards? From the other side now, I feel great sympathy and compassion, and can say only this to everyone, regardless of surgery, pain, fear, confusion, insurance:

You are going to be fine, and after an unspecified period of time, your life will return better than before.

Thursday, January 3, 2008

This Time Last Year

I was scrabbling around trying to find someone who knew what to do with me.

I could take about 25-50 steps, depending on the day, and then would be in pain any time I tried to walk after that.

I was sick of hearing the phrase 'pain management' from well-meaning nurses and doctors who were not themselves experiencing any pain (I don't want to MANAGE my pain, I want to be in a body that is not IN pain. Do you see the difference, smiley nurse lady?)

To my fellow hip women, wherever you may be on this mad journey: there is a light, I promise, and there are so many of us out there now to support you getting there. Kick-ass Lauren and I are almost done with our secret project that we hope will make things even better.